Author: Tabitha

After many years in Southern California my husband’s job has brought us to beautiful Oahu for what I hope will be his twilight tour. I was born in New England but have lived in New York, Pennsylvania, Florida and California. I enjoy the adventure the military lifestyle brings and the great friendships it forges. As a tax professional I have worked for the “big” tax offices and served as Operations Manager for a multi-location franchise. Being a huge tax nerd allows me to do what I love. Last year I began to build my own practice with my awesome business partner. We have big plans for the future. My life, my love, my world is my daughter Jaden. She is a mini-me in every sense of the word and keeps me grounded and laughing. I enjoy exploring the island and helping her learn new things. I enjoy being involved in my community and serve on the Parent Teacher Committee at Jaden’s school and as the Box Tops and Labels for Education Parent Coordinator. Giving back to our military community is also important to me so I help out as a member of our Family Readiness Team and give free tax advice and discounts during tax season to fellow military families.

Published on July 29, 2012 by Tabitha

Mickey gives Santa the boot

The happiest place on earth wasn’t too happy this week when for the second time in recent years it gave someone bearing an uncanny resemblance to ol’ St. Nick the option to look less like Santa or leave the park. What is the world coming to when the biggest celebrity of all time can’t enjoy a day at Disneyworld? Is this some sort of weird rivalry between universal symbols of childhood happiness?

Apparently the man looking like Santa was being “disruptive” to park operations because many other guests continued to stop him to take pictures. Who knew Mickey had jealousy issues. The Huffington Post Thomas Tolbert, the man asked to look less like Santa, is actually ranked one of the top Santa impersonators and after checking out the picture of him, I would think he was the real thing. At least Mr. Tolbert was dressed as a civilian, the last time Disneyworld kicked a jolly fat man out he was sporting the classic red suit. What does Disney do when a real celebrity shows up? I just read a story about Tom Cruise and his daughter at Disneyland. There is no way Tom Cruise made it through the park without being “disruptive”. The entourage of bodyguards alone has to cause problems for other guests.

A few years ago my husband and I went to SeaWorld in San Diego on New Year’s Day and saw a gentleman in an aloha shirt, Bahama shorts and sandals with the white hair and beard of Santa. He was carrying a hobo bag on the end of a stick and as we made eye contact he made a comment about finally getting in a vacation. We both laughed and thought that was the coolest thing. I don’t know if SeaWorld paid this guy as comic relief or it was a look-a-like legitimately on vacation and that was his way of dealing the people looking at him but either way we got a good chuckle out of it. It’s sad to think Disney obviously doesn’t have the same sense of humor. Maybe the next time we wait in line to see the mouse we’ll ask him to let Santa have a good vacation after Christmas.

NBC Video interview with Thomas Tolbert about the incident.

The Huffington Post

Published on July 29, 2012 by Tabitha

Penn State Sanctions – Is it enough?

By now I’m sure you’ve heard about the assistant football coach at Penn State that was recently convicted of 45 counts of sexual abuse involving ten young boys over a 15 year period. I’m still pissed off a bit about the entire situation and cannot believe such a high profile school kept this quiet for so long all for the sake of a sport. Don’t get me wrong, I love football but I cannot begin to imagine the pain the victims have and are still going through and the courage it took to come forward. Sandusky is awaiting sentencing but in the mean time Penn State got handed a hefty punishment from the NCAA:

$60 million dollar fine
a four year ban from playing the postseason
the loss of 20 scholarships
vacating 111 wins

Wow, that is a lot of money and a big blow to such a prestigious football program but is it enough? Is it right to punish the football players of today for the crimes of yesterday? Is it right to take away legitimate wins from the players that earned them? Football is big business affecting the school itself but also the local economy on game days. Attendance is sure to decrease and jobs eliminated as a result. The NCAA has announced the $60 million fine will go to fund child sexual abuse prevention. What about the victims? Lawyers for one have announced they plan to sue Penn State directly and others are sure to follow. I shudder to think of the number of additional victims that are out there who may come forward to sue the school directly.

What do you think about the punishment and what else if anything should be done to prevent this from happening again?

Published on July 23, 2012 by Tabitha

My Scariest Moment

I was asked recently what was the scariest thing I’ve experienced and what my advice would be to avoid it. This was a really tough question for me to answer. I am the strong one, the rock, the organized, always on time, the party planning, check book balancing to the penny, nothing can rattle her cage kind of girl. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized there are many scary experiences in this crazy life we lead:

As a Mom that split second you lose sight of you child in a store and your heart comes to a screeching halt, you gasp but no air fills you lungs and you begin to frantically call your child’s name at the same volume you would use if you were at a rock concert right in front of the speakers, only to see your little one bent down to pick something up off the floor on the other side of the shopping cart.

As a kid’s taxi driver the time between seeing someone about to ram into your car right where your child is sitting and what feels like an eternity later when your vehicle actually comes to a stop. Meanwhile your white-knuckled grip leaves permanent hand marks in the steering wheel cover and your calf muscle is cramped so tight you can’t even feel your foot from pushing that brake pedal with the force of a bulldozer.

As a military spouse every time you have to face the world in that first two weeks of deployment. With a phony smile on your façade of steel, because you’ve done this so many times before and you don’t want anyone to see that you still fall completely apart when you get home alone.

As a granddaughter living half a world away getting that phone call that your grandparent has taken a turn for the worse and knowing even if the Concorde was still in service and leaving the next minute you would not make it there on time.

As a professional having to go in and tell your boss your husband got PCS orders after getting your dream promotion making what you did three years ago when you left the last duty station.

Have you been through this? Our life is full of scary experiences equally terrorizing, driving you to the brink madness at times. I don’t enjoy them and wouldn’t wish them on even my worst enemy ; however, without them I wouldn’t be living. You can’t avoid the scary times, you can only embrace them, survive them the best you can, give them an inappropriate hand gesture and laugh about them one day over a glass of something bubbly during the retirement party. What are you going to laugh about? I need to know how much bubbly to buy!

Published on July 21, 2012 by Tabitha

Family Pizza night on a budget

For years now Friday has been our pizza and adult beverage night. Sometimes it’s just the three of us, sometimes the neighbors join in. I’m sure you know the drill: First you scour the web and the accumulated coupon pile looking for the best deal. Then spend the next 20 minutes trying to agree on toppings and type of crust that fits the special or coupon you have only to resort to “the usual” in the end. Then when it comes time to place the order, “someone” throws out “…it always tastes better when YOU order it” and you end up making the call. Of course, just when you think you’ve got it all figured out the not always friendly, talking so fast you can hardly understand them order taker on the other end of the phone has to throw you a curve ball by asking “did you want to add hot wings to that, we’ve got a special.” Mid-order changes almost always blows whatever savings you earned in the 45 minute think tank you just got out of.

Instead of going through all that rigmarole I recently began doing make-your-own pizza night instead. I know, the thought of making dough and all that flour all over your kitchen can be a bit of a turn-off but it’s much easier than you might thing. No, I’m not talking about those pre-baked cardboard tasting frisbees in the bread aisle. A lot of grocery stores and even some mom and pop pizza joints will sell you a pound of pizza dough at a really good price. (I usually pay $2.00 a pound). From the grocery store you have to roll out or stretch it but if you are making a round pizza you can easily turn the dough on the top of your fists and it will stretch out nicely to fit the pan. The little mom and pop places might even roll it out for you. Most little pizza places don’t advertise pizza dough for sale so you have to ask.

I also usually make my own tomato sauce but for pizza night it’s easier to open a can of premade sauce. My family likes the Del Monte Four Cheese variety that usually runs about a buck a can. One can will cover three to four pizzas. Add a bag of shredded mozzarella (about $2.50 and will cover at least two pizzas), a package of pepperoni (about $3 and is enough for at least two pizzas), bake 20 minutes in a 425 degree oven and you’ve got great pizza for at least half the price of delivery. (Oh yeah! Before I forget, oil the pizza pan or put some cornmeal down to keep your dough from sticking to it. )My family loves it because we usually each do our own pizza and there is no more high level negotiating and everyone gets what they want. My daughter goes for the classic pepperoni while my husband likes to add everything but the kitchen sink. I have settled on a great little number that has been dubbed “the girls pizza” which includes grilled chicken, feta cheese, onion, artichoke hearts and sun-dried tomatoes. No sauce and no mozzarella just a drizzle of olive oil on a garden herb flavored crust and I am in heaven! Sometimes I even sprinkle a little grated Parmesan cheese on the crust to be fancy.

I love to try out new combinations of toppings especially the sauce-less versions. What is your favorite pizza?

Published on July 17, 2012 by Tabitha

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

The countdown has begun! Lists are made. Stores are packed with anxious shoppers trying to score the best deals on the hottest items. Everyone is frantic, making sure everything is prepared for that absolutely glorious day you have been longing for all summer! The first day of school!

Oh, don’t get me wrong, I love spending time with my daughter and exploring this wonderful island we live on; however being able to get a pedicure, hit the commissary and accomplish something, anything ALONE does have its advantages. I only have one kiddo to lug around and I swear she can bend time and space. She has the uncanny ability to turn even the quickest, “just gonna run in” stop into at least a 20 minute expedition. Lewis and Clark made it back to St. Louis quicker than I can get out of Wal-mart. I couldn’t even imagine how some mommy’s do it with two, three or (gasp) more children in tow! These women should be nominated for saint-hood immediately, if not sooner! Not only does back to school time mean you get all your errands and to-do’s done faster but that also means a little “me” time for mommy. I’ll admit it; during that first week of school I’ve spent an entire day relaxing on the couch doing nothing, just to savor the sweet silence and not hearing “Momma!” every time I form a coherent train of thought.

Let’s not forget about the routine that back-to-school brings. I don’t know about you, but my household always functions better and seems happier when we are on a schedule. Take bedtime for example. I find myself a bit lax with bedtime during the summer. I mean if there is no reason to get up at 6 a.m why not let the little bugger stay up a little later and sleep in a bit? Ah yes, the Russian roulette that all parents play with the bedtime/sleeping-in ratio. Sure, it all sounds good in theory, but by extending bedtime here and there my little one does get a bit cranky on days we do have to get up early for a commitment, and it is more difficult for her to fall asleep when her bedtime varies.

There are drawbacks to back-to-school time as well. Getting the kids back into a homework routine can be rough. I was afraid of a complete and total erasure of my daughter’s brain over the summer. Visions of Agents J and K from the Men in Black agency rolling in with their cool toys and making my daughter forget she ever learned to read in Kindergarten danced through my head. So, being the concerned and slightly neurotic mommy that I am, I enrolled her in Harvard’s Summer Internships for Undergraduates. When I was informed, rather rudely by the way, that this program was only offered to students actually attending college at Harvard, I went with the next best thing for my future first grader, the summer reading program at our local library. Just to ensure I kept up with the Harvard curriculum I also used a math workbook to keep up her skills. Back to school usually coincides with back to extracurricular activities as well…scout meetings, dance classes, sports practices and Saturday games. Even with every Smartphone calendar and scheduling app, it’s still easy to over-schedule and over-involve yourself and your family.

This time of year we can use all the help we can get. If you’ve got some words of wisdom or success stories that worked for your family, please share them! I found this great list of tips to help get us back in the groove of school time:

http://www.napo-gpc.org/blog/2011/08/15-tips-for-getting-back-into-the-school-routine/

Whew, my head is spinning thinking about it all. Back-to-school may never overtake Christmas as the most wonderful time of the year, but I will still count down the days and relish that first week of uninterrupted shopping and self-pampering before reality sets in! Happy Holidays!

Published on July 13, 2012 by Tabitha

My Most Valuable Possession: My Dependent I.D. Card – Don’t Leave Home Without It!

If you’ve got a dependent I.D. card, by now you’ve figured out you can’t get on base without it, much less do anything there if you could. But did you realize how valuable it is off base? Yes, there are plenty of websites listing military discounts. Almost every hotel, rental car place and amusement park offers military discounts with I.D. A lot of movie theaters offer tickets at the matinee price but very few advertise it. Here on Oahu every tour company or activity offers one. Your base ITT office is the best resource for these. What about the little, everyday places you shop? Most local businesses in close proximity to a military installations offer discounts but what about when you travel to Nowhere-near-a-base, U.S.A.?

At my husband’s last duty station we lived over an hour away from his base and over 30 minutes away from the closest base. I know, I know, it’s awkward for some people to ask for a discount. Many spouses tell me they are embarrassed when the clerk tells them no. I’ve got a little trick I use to avoid that…

Wherever you go, whatever you do… shopping, visiting a museum, attending an event, if someone asks to see your identification (like when you go to pay for something) always, always, ALWAYS show your dependent I.D. first. I have received more discounts this way because it opens the door for the clerk to let you know about any military discounts they offer. Of course sometimes this means they need to void the transaction and re-ring it but hey, 10% off is worth the few extra minutes.

Oh, and don’t let me forget to mention service providers. These are companies many of us use everyday. All the major cell phone carriers offer between 15% to 19% off for active-duty military. Some cable providers offer introductory discounts (so much off a month for the first year) or waive instillation fees. Home improvement stores and even some car insurance companies give military discounts.

If you are still too shy to ask, as I mentioned there are many internet sites that can give you a list of military discounts in your area or the area you are traveling to. We’ve saved thousands between sunglasses and new computers alone. Here are few of my favorite points of reference, or ask your Family Readiness Officer. Many times they will pass this on or keep a list for you to reference.

Windward Mall Military Mondays

http://www.windwardmall.com/event/military-mondays-save-15-every-monday/

This one lets you see if it’s been verified with date stamps. You can also leave comments on your experience with the business or service.

http://www.militarydiscountlist.com/

For online stores and some local stores

http://www.military.com/discounts/